The Sportsman in me and other Beasts

The Sportsman in me and other Beasts

By

Gyan C A Fernando

Illustrated by N. Senthilkumaran

“Success is not really important. Everyone loves success. Everyone wants to do things well. But we all know that people are really good at doing things badly. Failure is the thing that we are best at. This is the difference between people and animals and we must not think that failure is bad.”

Stephen Pile, the author of “The Book of Heroic Failures”

I was never good at sports or I was good at it. It is a matter of opinion.

 I achieved my first major and historical victory in the field of sports; a long, long time ago in August 1959, when I come last in the Sack Race at the Sports Meet day at my old school, cheered by all! 

Your Presents Will Be Appreciated!

Your Presents Will Be Appreciated!

By

Gyan C. A. Fernando

Illustrated by N. Senthilkumaran

There is many a slip….

There is no doubt that life in Sri Lanka revolves around Births, Weddings and Funerals. The main box office puller out of the three however, is weddings.

I think I have already expressed my cynical views about weddings, elsewhere, but I think I did forget to tell you about wedding invitations, or “invites” to use the Sri Lankan colloquial, which of course is the misuse of a verb as a noun.

What with so many nephews and nieces of marriageable age lurking around, I am now an expert on how to draft wedding invitations. My favourite niece Samanmalee (“Sam” 35+, loud-mouthed, still single) has provided us enough entertainment over the years by getting engaged many more times than I can care to remember!

If there is an impending wedding in our extended families, there always are, and invitations are to be drafted or proofread, my services are generally called for. That is as long as I solemnly promise not to introduce craziness into the invitations, ‘till death do us part. (there is more!)

I Can’t Hear Myself saying Hiss to a Cat now!

I Can’t Hear Myself saying Hiss to a Cat now!

By

Gyan C A Fernando

Illustrated by N Senthilkumaran

In my very, very young and idiotic days I would creep up behind sleeping cats for the express purpose of saying “hiss” and scaring them out of their fur. It never worked. Normally, they would hear me at 50yards range and would walk away calmly with their supercilious attitude intact and with their tails still at full mast.  

Cats always had a head start on us kids.

My three younger sisters would remember my activities in this particular field of scientific research.

Sri Lanka was very quiet sound-wise then. One could hear birds singing and even hear Geckos making their disapproving “chack chack” noises. You could even hear a coconut deciding not to fall off a tree!

Having returned to the good Old Republic after a lapse of what seemed to be a too long a time, (opinions do differ on this in our household), I was delighted to find out that this activity, that of scaring cats, is now possible and with good dividends! 

Think Plastic or Swim

Think Plastic or Swim

 My Efforts to Counter Global Warming

By

 Gyan C A Fernando

With illustrations by N. Senthilkumaran

Drastic events need drastic action! That is what I always say when I’ve had a beer, or two. They have been sinking for years, not the beers; and no one has done anything for them except generate a lot of hot air in Geneva and in New York.

Unlike them, I am a Man of Action, a sort of a Superman or a Minor Deity!  You know what I mean, don’t you?  No?

Why Boys Love Trains and Girls Love Dolls

 

Why Boys Love Trains and Girls Love Dolls

Pseudo Scientific Research of the Zany Kind!

This article appeared in the Lanka Railway Digest (August 2012 issue)

Read it here:  LINK
 

Acalculia and I

 

Acalculia and I

I was never a calculating sort of person

By

Gyan C A Fernando

With illustrations by N.Senthilkumaran

Acalculia and I

Some of you out there, having just got up on a Sunday morning and having just glanced at but not really comprehended the main title of this article, are probably thinking that Acalculia is a young Eastern European, short-skirted, disco type tart that I once used to associate with.

Others, well-versed in Classic Greek Literature in their formative years and who have just had the advantage of an invigorating early morning cup of tea might be thinking, with smug complacency, that Acalculia must be one of those nasty Siren type girls from Greek Mythology. Well you know Medusa et al don’t you?

Can you all now get up and stand in the corner of the class!

You are all wrong! It is neither!

For most people it is quite easy-peasy to work out that the logarithm of whatever is something-or-the-other, just off the tops of their heads. For me, the complex mathematical formula of two plus two is quite easy, but anything else is a challenge.

STSpectator

STSPECTATOR

A Blog about books and reading by a Sri Lankan: http://stspectator.wordpress.com/author/stspectator/